Tweets from Cassandra Widdershin's Blood Lion

'The President Was In Danger Of Dying,' Medical Expert Says After Latest Revelations About Trump

Wednesday, December 8, 2021

So Much For ExpertsCan we not hear anymore about Turdwaffle until the obit?

Kylie Rittenhouse Claims Crumbley Reward

Saturday, December 4, 2021

Paladin Protective Services Tracks Down Bad Parents To Make America Great AgainAcquitted Kenosha Killer Kylie Rittenhouse’s Paladin Protective Services was instrumental in the capture of Dick and Jehn Crumbley, parents of accused school shooter 14-year-old Ethan Frome Crumbley, according to Matt “He’ll...

How Omicron Is Pronounced

Thursday, December 2, 2021

It’s Easy When You See It Abbreviated On TwitterThat’s right.
OMG! OMC is here!

America Must Better Prepare For More Mass Shootings

Wednesday, December 1, 2021

What Else Can We Do? When things ain’t broke, you can’t fix them. That’s the American Way! If it ain’t in the Constituion, it damn well should be. Among the most important rights this country has to offer are the ones listed in the Second Amendment, which lets anyone arm bears to form a well-regulated...

NRA Lobbies Congress To Give Bullets Right Of Way

Wednesday, December 1, 2021

LaPierre Calls Proposed Legislation Common Sense“I don’t know about you,” one of America’s favorite untouchable leaders told a gathering of slobbering gun aficionados protesting protestors of one of our nation of miserable fucks’ recent mass school shootings, “but I’m not willing to bet my health &...

There's Good News Tonight

Wednesday, November 24, 2021

Wisconsin Gave Us Joe McCarthy & Kylie Rittenhouse’s Acquittal…while a nearly all-white jury in southern Georgia chose to believe their eyes & ears and weigh the consequences of someone aggressively pursuing an opportunity to engage in self-defense.
Cheddar white Wisconsin’s ideal judge Ricky...

Biden Pardons Donald & Donald Junior In First Presidential Turkey Pardon

Friday, November 19, 2021

Big Birds Shit On Hand That Freed ThemIn a move certain to infuriate Mr. Pillow Mike Lindell & the former twice-impeached unidicted co-conspirator, President Biden this morning pardoned two turkeys, named Donald & Donald Junior, at the annual pardoning of the turkeys ceremony, the first of his presidency.

Did Jake Gyllenhaal Auction One Inch Squares Of Taylor's Red Scarf On E-Bay?

Wednesday, November 17, 2021

Disquieting Minds Demand To KnowOh, the humanity!

Judge Says 2nd Amendment Trumps Any Law Against The Rights Of Guns To Own America

Monday, November 15, 2021

Judge Claims Roland Freisler Speaks To Him In DreamsIn his latest effort to ensure Kylie Rittenhouse gets away with murder, alleged son of repatriated WWII German eugenic scientists, Judge Bruce Almighty Schroeder, dismissed the one count for which there is no doubt the young wannabe Hitler Youth recruiter...

Woke Crowd Calls Rittenhouse A Big Crybaby

Thursday, November 11, 2021

Rittenhouse Fires Back With AR15 Previously Owned By Charlton HestonTeen white supremacist hero Kylie Rittenhouse took the stand Wednesday in his own defense after a woke Twitter mob accused him of being “a chubby crybaby who has barely outgrown his Huggies Pull-Em-Ups & has yet to learn the difference...

Trump To Pardon Youngkin's Son When Reinstated

Friday, November 5, 2021

Teen Tried To Vote Twice For McAuliffe“The Democrats probably put him up to it,” former unindicted co-conspirator & subject of numerous federal & state investigations, Donald J. Turdwaffle said in a call to a Fox affiliate airing a “Dittos: The Best Of Rush Limbaugh” episode during which Rush spewed...

Promoting Racist Family Values Still A Winning Repugnicunt Strategy

Wednesday, November 3, 2021

Playing All Trumps Or No Trumps Is Still A Bridge To NowhereAmerica is never going improve to the level of the lowest EU country until saying “Well, that’s white of you” is seen for the grim irony it has always contained.
Our national media is a disgrace, unable to bring themselves to see beyond...

Ashli Boebert's Family May Sue Lindsey Graham For Wrongful Death

Monday, November 1, 2021

More Fallout From The Amazon Washington Post January 6th ReportAfter months of former twice-impeached unindicted co-conspirator Donald J. Turdwaffle demanding to know who killed  Ashli Boebert, it now appears the deposed autocrat has a pretty good idea of who may have authorized her execution on January...

Somewhere In A Multiverse Too Close For Comfort

Thursday, October 28, 2021

The Ruggles Have Released A New SingleIn a rare exclusive, the Portland Pataphysical Outpatient Clinic, Lounge & Laundromat gained access to material hacked by the mysterious Anonymous Anonymous group, including lyrics to The Ruggles latest sure-to-be-classic rock & roll cautionary tale of greed and...

Is There No One To Rid Us Of These Deplorable Judges?

Tuesday, October 26, 2021

You Say Potato & I Say He’s An AssholeIf you have to wonder how we ended up with so many Nazi lawyers on the bench, you haven’t been paying attention to 40 years of the Reagan Legacy’s supply-side plantation economy, where the idea of chattel has expanded to include roughly 99% of the American people.

How To See Uranus Alongside Hunter Biden's Moon In The Night Sky This Week

Friday, October 22, 2021

You Might Spot Some Exciting Stars As WellThe bright light of Hunter Biden’s moon will lead the way to Uranus in the early morning prostate runs this week, and with any luck you may also catch a glint of a “spurting penis star” while gazing longingly at the scandalous celestial pair.

Turdwaffle Launches Socialist Media Scam

Thursday, October 21, 2021

“You Can’t Handle The Truth About Socialism” Site Hacked On First DayAs former twice-impeached unidicted co-conspirator Donald J. Turdwaffle scrambles to stay out of jail after a pathetically long life of grifting & street-level criminal activity, a new toxic destination on Ted Steven’s Interweb, a...

143 Fully Vaccinated Oregon Residents who Received Pfizer Vaccine Have Died Of COVID-19

Tuesday, October 19, 2021

Most Died In Portland From Gunshot WoundsThe Oregon Health Authority now recommends that most fully vaccinated Oregonians hunker down in their subterranean panic rooms until the latest wave of gun violence is over.
“The vaccine is no substitute for full-body armor,” Doctor Faustroll told a sparsely...

Turdwaffle Tell Supporters Not To Vote Until He Is Reinstated

Thursday, October 14, 2021

Complains That Rich Fucks Won’t Shoot Him Into Space For FreeContinuing his Keep Making America Great Again Again campaign to regain access to executive privilege through reinstatement as president, former twice-impeached unindicted co-conspirator & supreme scofflaw Donald J. Turdwaffle last night...

Marjoe Faylor Greene Celebrates #ColombiaDay

Tuesday, October 12, 2021

Druglords Drag Georgia Lawmaker On TwitterAmerica’s favorite distaff dumbfuck lawbreaker from Georgia tried to downplay the significance of Joe Biden proclaiming October 11 “Indigenous People’s Day” to honor the victims of our great heritage of Manifest Destiny.
In her own highly illiterate way,...