And With Shadrach We Begat The Begats

Sep 6, 2021

In The Chronicles Of Our Anals No One Has Ever Been A Bigger Asshole Than What’s His Name, Chapter 29, Verse 13

So I’d be with the parents, talking about the excellent coffins we provided their heroes. I wanted to have food, but they said it was tacky. And I’ve told this story millions of times. The parents would sometimes be unbelievable, you would almost not understand.

It was like, “Sir, it’s so great to meet you. Thank you for all you have done to make America great. My son…” or my daughter, a lot of them had dead daughters. And they’d always tell stories about their dead child. “So my son could throw a football so long. He was a quarterback in high school. He was a quarterback in college. Sir, I think he could have been in the NFL. He was really good. He was so great. He would have liked this.” 

Some of them would say: “Sir, my daughter was one of the greatest football players in her prep school,” meaning soccer, because that’s what we call soccer in the United States, where football is not round but shaped like a football so it can be thrown thousands of yards to our great receivers right before halftime.

But I did not talk about the purple haired girls, because these dead girls were heroes.

And so we’re waiting for the plane to come in. And sometimes they’d be talking about their nieces and nephews. Lots of nieces and nephews were killed, coming out of the Middle East, because of terrible Democrat decisions.

“My daughter was so beautiful, sir. She was so incredible. She was the greatest.” And I’d say to the general and the colonel that ran Dover, the great people… We have great, by the way, we have great generals. We have great generals. The ones you see on television are not the ones that are great. The great ones like to hide in the shadows.