KuklaM*A*S*H Kicks Ass & Calls Names


Says Democrats Don’t Understand Democracy Anymore

And here to introduce the former twice-impeached unindicted co-conspirator & all around malignant asshole, Donald J. Turdwaffle, is our good buddy & original average American, Forrest Q. Gump:

“Thank you, Doctor Faustroll. I am so happy not to be here. As my momma always said: ‘Stupid is as stupid votes,’ & no one in our nation of miserable fucks knows that better than what’s his name.”

Statement by Donald J. Turdwaffle, Loser awaiting indictment

for crimes against humidity

What we witnessed yesterday was the last pitiful gaffes of a corrupt and covfefe left-wing political and media establishment that has, for centuries, driven our great country into the ground — chipping away at our jobs, surrendering our privilege, sacrificing our sovereignty, attacking our great plantation heritage & American family values, and trying to turn America into a country that the very fine people on America’s side can barely recognize.

Why haven’t they ever learned what every good American is born knowing before they get to elementary school? “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!”  That’s why we have our great Constitution. For all their advantages, this woke crowd is pretty dumb. America has always believed in win-win victories, where we win, and we all win. That’s what we mean by putting America First.

These radical leftists in Washington care NOTHING for the real American Democracy. They don’t care about any facts except their scientific ones. They hate Christmas. Remember when you couldn’t say “Merry Christmas?” I put a stop to all those failed policies of the past. All they care about is control over you, our great Republicans, while amassing incredible wealth and riches for themselves.

Republicans deserve to be rich as much as they do. It’s called leveling the playing field, so when things are tight and tied at the end of regulation, we have a good chance of still pulling this out in overtime. That’s all anyone can ask for, which is what all good patriotic Americans are asking for.

But they are failing. No one believes them anymore. And the day of quickies is coming to an end when they will be overwhelmingly voted out of power and dragged into the streets to get what’s coming for them for what they did to our valorous attempts to stop the steal and restore us to our rightful place in power, instead of rounding up more than 700 of the greatest Americans in history because of antifa.

Joe Biden’s voice is now the voice of reason and compromise, which is not how you make America GREAT. Whatever happened to carrying the big stick? I loved carrying that big stick, but when you’ve got a big stick, what good is a big stick, if you’re not going to use it?

His antifa handlers gave him that speech to read yesterday because they know the undefensible failures of his presidency and the left-wing extremism of the Pelosi-Schumer Congress have destroyed the Democrat Party, which is why they must steal elections with illegal mail-in ballots that we tried to stop with our great postmaster Louis CK, who is still doing a great job. But they are trying to lynch him. We can’t let than happen.

Part of their panic is motivated by the realization that, just like the Russia Collusion Hoax, the Impeachment hoaxes, the fake news, the Kung Flu, how they abandoned our border and gave our great wall to the Mexicans, they cannot sustain the preposterous fabrications about January 6 much longer. The truth is coming out, and I will continue to give it to you.

But for them, the worst part of it all is the knowledge that the very fine people on both sides are seeing right through their phony media event — which despicably compared a Pelosi-led security failure at the Capitol to the darkest days in American history and the deaths of 3,000 Americans, when their policies have killed more than 800,000 Americans with the coronavirus hoax alone. How many people still can’t flush their toilets or take a shower? You know the answer.

Our very fine people see right through that sham. They see a cynical politician who ran for office promising unity who is now doing the most divisive thing possible—prosecuting his political opponents as domestic terrorists, just because they stood up against the rigged election, just like insecure dictators do in communist countries, or New York and California.

The American People also see that January 6 has become the Democrats’ excuse and pretext for the most chilling assault on the civil liberties of American citizens since the War of Northern Aggression. It is being used to justify outrageous attacks on free speech, simply because it hurts their feelings.

Look at all the widespread censorship, de-platforming, calls for increased domestic surveillance, appalling abuse of political prisoners, labeling opponents of COVID lockdowns and mandates as national security threats, and even ordering the FBI to target parents who object to the radical indoctrination of their children in school, such as not teaching the Bible, which has the Ten Commandments, which is where the Bill of Rights comes from.

And this week, January 6 is also the Democrats’ excuse for trying to pass a radical Federal takeover of state election law. They are trying to BAN voter ID, background checks, poll taxes, DNA testing, genealogies, random drug tests, and other basic measures that can ensure the sacred integrity of the vote that our founding fathers said should never be done by mail.

The reason the Democrats are doing all of this is not because they believe they will win a fair and honest election. It’s because they know they will overwhelmingly LOSE one, if Republicans have any say in the matter. And the truth is we own most of the states, so we get to say who gets to vote. We are no longer the Silent Majority. We are the Armed Majority, and we’re mad as hell and we’re not going to take it anymore. 

Remember, I am not the one trying to undermine American Democracy — I am the one trying to SAVE American Democracy. It's right in my logo at the top of this letter. We are raising money to take America back from the rich Democrats and return it to average people like you, who wear my hats and wave my flags and still want to see me reinstated.

Today, I am more confident than ever in the strength and common sense of the American People, the very fine people like you, who are counting the days until we will no longer have to be constantly lectured to, lied to, and dictated to by corrupt Democrat politicians and their media partners who want to take away our privileges and let other far less deserving people have them, people you don’t like either, because that’s how all good Americans have been raised since the beginning of history.

All these hoaxes from Russian Collusion to the Kung Flu to Climate Change, all this shit will go away like a miracle, and we will no longer have to put up with this broken establishment’s hoaxes and its manufactured media narratives that are making fun of the very things that make us great, that you know deep in your heart, as your parents and their parents before them.

And as Biden and his NATO handlers know, that day is coming fast, but not fast enough. I should have been reinstated on January 20, 2021, and I would have been if not for Black Lives Matter and antifa storming the Capitol to make you look bad. Because in the months and years ahead, the American People are going to speak up, express their Second Amendment, take action, and VOTE legally in massive numbers in the open carry states, and we are going to TAKE BACK OUR COUNTRY. We have all the weapons we need to do it right this time.

From the very beginning, all that Americans have wanted is warm shoes, a tight pussy, and a warm place to shit, great jobs, safe neighborhoods, strong borders, good schools, a proud nation, a government that LISTENS to the American People, & someone telling that government what to do. That is what our movement has always been about—and that is what we are focused on to this day.

Joe Biden and the Radical Democrats have failed on every front over the last five years. But do not lose hope. America WILL be Great Again. And you can get in on the ground floor, but not if you don't act soon.

So join me and DONATE TO SAVE AMERICA. You'll be glad you did. And so will I.

Paid for by Save America For The MAGAts and not authorized by any candidate or candidate’s committee. All sales final.

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