It’s The Only Way To Combat Critical Race Theory & Those Damned Liberal Snowflakes

“No more Mr. Nice Cuy,” Sen. Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Word, KY) told an unnamed source we could just as easily have made up, but we here at The Portland Pataphysical Outpatient Clinic, Lounge, and Laundromat have principles, unlike most of the assholes around us, but I don’t want to get into that right now, because there is apparently important work to do, so we assure our confused readers that if we were making any of this shit up, don’t you think we’d be in jail like the former twice-impeached unindicted co-conspirator and everybody’s favorite modern Nazi, Donald J. Grabito Pussolini?

#ExistentialTrickQuestions