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Family Claims Mom’s Ashes Spell Out Emotional Message For Them On Surface Of Water: ‘Chills All Over’
May 14, 2022
Dad Always Told Us She Was A Real Bitch But This Was Next Level Dickishness
Proving that there is nothing better than a brutal burn to liven up a funeral, the Baxter Family claims matriarch Amerique Baxter got the last laugh after 82 years of making everyone around her cringe whenever she was in public. What Honey Baxter remembers most about her childhood were the frequent trips to the emergency room because of how unlucky the family was to have such weak bones.
Now it seems that Amerique was not content with going gentle into that good night and had one last stream of obscenities to unleash on her family.
Daughter Chlamydia Backstrand (@mamasclamgirlBR549) gained more than 20 million views, 1 billion likes, and hundreds of thousands of comments after uploading the hilarious #AllAmericanMom moment to her Truth Social account.
We all are taught that you are supposed to grieve the loss of a family member, no matter how terrible and vicious that person was as they fulfilled their patriotic duty and shaped a new generation of miserable fucks to ensure no one fixes anything that isn’t broken, to #KeepAmericaGreat.
For some, the act of finally getting rid a monstrous family member can help bring closure without the #RuleOfLawyers burdening our racist legal system with even more frivolous lawsuits that prevent us from dealing with uppity crime on our unsafe streets in the way God intended.
When Chlam and her dysfunctional family lost their abusive mom, they sought healing and closure by honoring her final wishes: to be taken to the Reflecting Pool on the National Mall in Washington, D.C. so that “that Rodney Luther King feller don’t get the last word on what we white folks can dream about.”
But as Honey Baxter sprinkled Amerique’s cremains across the pool, Sunday Baxter noticed an all-too-familiar message on the water’s surface.
“Look!” Sunday shouted. “The old bitch is still pissed off. “Fuck this shit!” It says “Fuck this shit and fuck you too!”
Honey, Chlam, and the family weren’t the only ones who saw the message in the Reflecting Pool. Dozens of Truthers took to the comments section to share what they saw.
“At first I saw her hand with the middle finger extended,” said Harry Balzac, “but then it looked like the secret QAnon three-ring sign. Stop the Steal!”
“Anyone else see the Shroud of Urine?” another user asked.
“What a bunch of horsehsit,” Paul Fericano wrote, “People die all the time, which is God’s way of shutting them the fuck up.”
“That’s the absolute most awesome thing I have ever seen!” said @DoubtingThomas, “and I was there when the Jews killed Jesus and the skies opened up and the entire area was buried under tons of rotten fish and matzohs.”
Although many skeptics called the video “lame and pathetic,” most readers seemed to think the evil Chlam’s mom did has clearly outlived her.
While we may never truly know what happens when our torturers die, the hatred they have for us will forever live on.