Expect Big Things When We Take Back Everything Come November, Donnie Douchebag Tells Lamestream Alaskan Idiots
Former twice-impeached unindicted co-conspirator & kid voted most likely to secede while still in elementary boarding school, Donald Grabito Pussolini told a thong-baring throng of very fine Alaskan people estimated to be slightly larger than the gaggle of willingly-grabable pussy that battled Tik Tok Teen disinformation to attend his infamous Tulsa Massacre Day speech that “all we good men and women need to do to make America Great Again Again is to reinstate your favorite president during the upcoming late term elections & prevent the Democrats from aborting the vote in the states we have set our long range sights on, who have already agreed to replace their stolen Biden electors with our legitimate ones, and then we can finally show these liberals and antifa what America is can finally be like when it is even greater again.”
Pussolini touched briefly on his golden oldies of uneducated white person grievances from Mexicans unloading their criminals into Democrat social safety nets, to caravans of Muslim terrorists overwhelming our borders so that when another 9/11 occurs is not as important as how the stock market reacts, to why the sky being blue is clearly another example of reality’s liberal bias, to how it’s a crying shame how badly the first lady was treated “just because she sounds like a Russian agent. I would never marry a Russian agent. Why would I marry a Russian agent just to become president?”
“Because you’re a fucking money-grubbing prick willing to do business with anyone just to prove what a money-grubbing prick you really are?” asked a Tik Tok Teen who had allegedly disguised himself as a white Christian nationalist to gain access to the invitation-only fund-raising event.
Apparently, word had leaked that Pussolini was in Alaska, despite the tens of thousands of C.O.N.F.I.D.E.N.T.I.A.L e-mails asking for donations to Keep America Great or Stop The Steal & not just to endorse former Repugnicunt Vice-Presidential Candidate Fartordinaire Sarah Sirhan Palin, but also to secure an airfield to officially host his recently refurbished Trump Force One, financed entirely by contributions from the uneducated who think they defending democracy from transvestites and same-sex poke & strokers, while funding the repeal of the Emancipation Proclamation that has “made them fucking niggers so damn uppity,” as my grandma used to say.
“We chose Alaska,” Pussolini said, “because Sarah, I love Sarah, don’t you love Sarah? Everybody loves Sarah, and Sarah can see Russia from her front porch, and we both think it’s time for some front porch diplomacy to resolve this whole Russian issue with Hunter Biden’s laptop and Crooked Hillary’s servers that led to the preemptive invasion of Ukrainia.”
“How can you use ‘nigger’ in a blog post in this day & age, you worthless old fuck?” my woke liberalitarian readers may very well to be clueless enough to ask, “Have you no job in our supply-side plantation economy that we can cancel you from?”
I’m a cave painter, assholes. Not even the National Unnatural Endowment for the Arts is stupid enough to fund cave painters who refuse to even acknowledge the wheel as a huge step forward in human evolution. So go piss up somebody else’s rope.
Damn, I’m good.
And you’re just an ordinary pro-American asshole, ashamed of its own pathetic farts. That’s #TheAmericanWay!