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A Few Words To The Wise Asses

Thousands Protest Transexual Music City Bowl

12/31/21

MAGA Crowd Roars Displeasure Accusing Sponsors Of Straight Genocide

There were more than a smattering of MAGA hats among the 60,000 protestors who showed up for Thursday’s matchup between Tennessee and Purdue, a thriller won by the Boilermakers in overtime by the score of 48-45.

The raucous crowd had been spurred on by Yossarian Universal News Service’s call to action which accused the Music City Bowl of being co-opted “by homosexuals and other deviants in the music industry to influence our children to catch the gay themselves.”

YU News stringers flooded right-wing & evangelical social media sites with disinformation that depicted beefy oiled males clad only in leather thongs hugging one another during practice sessions for the Transexual Music City Bowl. 

Within hours, Anwar’s Christian Soldier Brigade had begun recruiting protestors “to demonstrate our love of Jesus in subduing our enemies through peaceful demonstration. We shall not abide such an abomination. If we let the Transexuals sponsor one bowl game,” said spokeswoman Emily Litella Jr, ”pretty soon we’ll have a Gay Pride Peanut Butter Bowl or a Pedophile Family Bowl.”

YU later claimed their contracted proofreader had messed up & missed the error when Microsoft Word’s autocorrect feature changed “Transperfect” (a business solutions company) to “Transexual” (a forbidden lifestyle condemned by some imaginary gods). They also had “no idea” how the sexually suggestive photo came to be associated with the post.

When told that the entire kerfuffle had just been one huge mistake by the world’s first parody news and disinformation syndicate, Ms Litella responded: “Oh, never mind.”

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