Writes the Wrongs
Marjoe Faylure Malaprop Blames Tampon Shortage On Trannie Hoarders
Freshman Georgia Dingbat Calls Tampon Supply Chain Issues A New “Holocaust On Women”
Freshman Rep. Marjoe Faylure Malaprop (R-Word, GA) told a gathering of Old Biddies Minding Everybody Else’s Bidnez in Cornelia this morning that the latest disease to jump from the “Chinese peach tree dish” to the backdoor of average good Christian Americans everywhere is “this transexual pox that has infected the supply chains we used to keep our economy in before the woke mob came and ruined everything for everyone.”
According to Malaprop, the recent explosion in populations of transexual and other uppity segments of a supply-side plantation economy that would do better off without so many of them proves that “men are buying up all our tampons and draining the strategic tampon reserve, and there are rumors they may have sabotaged the baby formula stockpile to endanger the lives of potential future Republican voters.”
While most Americans dismiss Malaprop as a feckless blowhard who thinks that means she gives good head, the burgeoning heavily-armed uneducated class thinks she may have a valid point other than the one on top of her empty head. According to recent polling, idiots are the fastest growing demographic in our nation of miserable fucks.
Critics of the racist bimbo are quick to point out that the pandemic placed an increased demand on plastic and cotton, two main materials used in manufacturing tampons, which were also urgently needed to produce personal protective equipment, such as masks, disposable gowns, and anti-microbial cadaver cosies for victims of the Democrat coronavirus hoax too cowardly to inject bleach or shine lasers up their poop chutes.
The problem has only been aggravated by Russia’s invasion of Ukraine, which is intended to dig up information on the Biden family that helps reelect former twice-impeached unindicted co-conspirator and only seditious president in the entire history of this nation of miserable fucks in 2024. Between the two countries, they control more than 70% of the raw materials required to produce the kinds of tampons American women are willing to pay top dollar for.
The plastic fields in Ukraine have lain fallow as fighting continues to rage in the ductile breadbasket of Europe, while laboratory-grown Russian cotton is a scarce commodity because Putin directed the sector to produce more weapons of mass destruction in its defense of oligarchy against liberal democracy.
Malaprop is no stranger to controversy. She has often promoted violence as a way for uneducated white people to “stand up against these over-educated Northern shitheads who think just because they can read the Constitution that it protects them more than it does us. Well, I got news for you gays and liberals and antifa trannie terrorists. We got the Second Amendment on our side, and you don’t want to mess with someone who knows his or her Second Amendment. You can take the rest of your Constitution and shove it where the sun don’t shine.”