Writes the Wrongs
Clemson Freshman Student Section Responds To Paul Feinbaum
Freshman Cheer Shocks Absolutely No One
The Baghdad Bob of CNN, Paul Feinbaum, recently decided that Clemson football’s dynasty is over. Feinbaum, who got his start as Mr. Know-It-All on Rocky & Bullwinkle, where he was also the understudy for Mr. Peabody’s sidekick Sherman, has considered South Carolina’s land grant college his personal property to fuck with as he pleases.
He particularly dislikes the boundless optimism & corny Christianity of Dabo Swinney, one of America’s most annoying coaches, often referring to the Clemson Tiger head honcho as “a wannabe Ted Lasso, except in reverse.” Whatever that means.
To show their appreciation of Mr. Feinbaum’s informed opinion, t Clemson Tiger Rally squad led the freshman rat section in a racous cheer inspired by the state’s great heritage.
Early in the 3rd quarter after the scoreboard displayed Feinbaum face, the students chanted: “This Jew will not replace us!”