Mr. Mayor Claims Anyone Who Incites Or Inspires Violence Against Me Must Be Held Accountable

“It’s a novel legal theory I just heard about on Truth Social,” Mr. Guiliani said, wiping what he insisted was an peanut butter stain from his nose.

“All we need now is to purchase some favorable evidence to support this great theory,” the lifelong closeted Nazi said, “and we’re prepared to pay top dollar for  a willing witness who is unafraid to face allegations of potential conflicts of interest from antifa and the liberal media.”