Sticks And Stones May Break Our Bones But A Word Can Drive Us To Murder
Apr 2, 2022
That’s The Lesson To Be Learned From Will Smith’s Defense Of Jada’s Knuckleheaded Honor
It’s a good thing The Prince of Bel Air wasn’t packing last Sunday. We could have been treated a special There’s Good News Tonight segment, featuring the ultimate reverse Chris Chubbock at The Oscars™!
Mr. Smith went to The Oscars and was enraged enough by a harmless joke to assault the someone who made that joke on a live international broadcast and many of his peers and other uneducated nimrods applauded him for it, because that’s #TheAmericanWay!
That’s where we are in the final throes of our current paleo-pataphysical spin on the Tilt-A-Whirl of repeatedly perfecting the same failed policies of the past over and over and expecting to be rewarded for it with a plaque or statuette in this small moment where everything is what it is and that’s all that it is. Did you get any on you?
I didn’t. “It” could just as easily have been blood and brain matter, which is what I thought when I read how a Clark County Sheriff’s deputy shot and killed an off-duty Vancouver police officer within seconds of arriving at the home of the cop he was about to kill after a high-speed chase involving a robbery I suspect he probably thought deserved what he was about to get. That’s #TheAmericanWay.
I don’t like cops. I don’t like arbitrary authority, and cops are hired to enforce arbitrary authority. The arbitrary authorities give cops guns and bullets to do the job of enforcing arbitrary authority, and they send you the bill in the form of taxes and fees. Every time anyone is killed by a cop, you helped pay for it. Give yourselves all a big hand. That’s #TheAmericanWay!
Some of my best friends became cops so they could remain the hoodlums our families raised us to be and blow off a little steam now and then while keeping the peace in exchange for immunity from prosecution for any crimes they may have inadvertantly committed while on the clock.
“It’s a perfect situation, Doc, for people like us” they tell me. “We have right to do whatever the law permits, so long as we make sure everything ends up in the worst case scenario that our lawyers are trained to defend us against. It is what it is.”
Why is it when the authorities do something heinous, it is written off as the failings of human nature by the people being paid to enforce arbitrary authoritiy, while when the people they are paid to subjugate make mistakes, often involving laws they are not even aware of, it’s OK to blow them away?
I don’t know about you, but the way things are going in our nation of miserable fucks right now, and considering Florida and Texas in particular, I blame catastrophic climate change on antifa, Black Lives Matter, Critical Race Theory, and allowing children to mention in class that their parents are gay.
ABOUT THE PPOCLL
The Portland Pataphysical Outpatient Clinic, Lounge & Laundromat was founded by Lawrence Nada in a single-wide mobile tarpaper shanty on Mt. Gilead Rd, Pittsboro, NC in 1976, using Alfred Jarry's original recipe.
Committed to imaginary excellence, PPOCLL staff & patients offer & demand side alternatives to & which has left the USA so noxious that whales continue to beach themselves on our shores in protest.
Portland Pataphysical Outpatient Clinic, Lounge & Laundromat
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P.O. Box 398
Banks, OR 97106-0398