I Have Arrived! Although There’s Them Might Wonder How I Even Managed To Survive!

Published by drfaustroll under Pataphysics February  22, 2009

Last week while trying to become more popular amongst my dwindling cohort of peers, I built an apparatus at my home office work station that, when activated by the proper key combination, would drive a pair of Pentel Rolling Writers through my ears and penetrate this wayward brain in a pataphysical perietal lobotomy that would make me into a modern day Randall Patrick McMurphy, but without a Chief Broom to save him.

I was about to test the contraption this morning on a stray golden lab who started hanging around a couple of weeks ago, when I checked my VIP stats, and it was as if Pennsylvania had suddenly ceased to be a state where idiots gladly stand on their heads in pools of feces for an occasional Superbowl victory. Yes, it was a sign from Gus. I had arrived.